It'd be great to be in a position where you can make choices regardless of money. My tastes are always gonna lead me to go for the amazing project where I'm being paid in Turkish cantaloupes.

I live by 'Earnin' and burnin'.' Meaning, I like to make money and spend it before I even have it. That's the way I live my life.

There's always going to be someone as funny as you or funnier.

Inappropriate behavior makes me laugh.

There are a lot of really funny guys who are very natural in what they do: Jonah Hill, Michael Cera, Seth Rogen.

Happens I am very political. I have deep political instincts.

I might be more fluent in Swedish than I am in Spanish. My wife speaks it to our kids, and they're fluent so I hear it all the time, so I've got that under my belt.

It's very easy for me to play silly, but to reveal something closer to you, that's so much harder.

I'm the minority in my house sometimes. My wife is Swedish, and we go to Sweden and everyone is rattling off in Swedish. It's like, 'OK, I can just read a book.'

I speak as much Spanish as anyone who has grown up in Southern California or Texas or Arizona. I had my three years of high-school Spanish and a couple of semesters in college.

I would love to play Simon Cowell in a movie - heck, I would love it. It would be my dream role.

Molly Shannon and I used to always talk about that we really felt strongly that we were comedic actors, that we weren't comedians. You just played things real and the comedy came out of the context.

When a dramatic actor does a funny film, people are like, 'Wonderful! I didn't know he was funny!' But when it flips, people can get really thrown by it.

I think 'SNL' was such a unique thing because it was material you created and you're very comfortable with it, even though the setting was pressure-packed.

You tend to get reluctant to talk about anything until the day before filming.

You still have that competitive thing where you want to try to make hits. That won't go away, unless the mayor of show business says my time's up.

I've always had, when I needed it, an extreme amount of focus that I could put into something. That has served me well.

I will watch a movie that is quote unquote dark and not get the qualification of what is dark and what is not.

I still regret that I never played soccer in high school. I chose basketball over soccer.

One of my first memories of being a kid was, 'I want to have a real job when I grow up.' And to me that meant you wear a suit and a hat and carry a briefcase and go to your job.

Enjoy the little fun things - like taking your kids to school - before they're all grown up.

When you hear that you're going to be working with a first-time director, sometimes that can be a concern to people.

I've never had a yard sale, ever, in my life. I don't know if I ever thought about stuff I would get rid of.

My dad turned me onto Peter Sellers as a kid. I loved the fact that he was a unique combination of being extremely subtle and over-the-top all at the same time, and that's a hard thing to do. I admire that.

I've always loved watching the news on TV. As a kid, I loved watching Walter Cronkite, for some reason.

I grew up in an entertainment family, and so I saw how susceptible you are to the ups and downs of this business.

I know the nature of comedy, and you never know what will happen with the next movie or whether people will find it funny.

I was a strange kid in that, while most kids hate school and want to turn 18 or 21, I loved high school.

I left home to go to college, and then I moved back home. I moved back for three years from 21 to 24.

The funny guy doesn't get the girl until later in life. High school, college, everyone still wants the brooding, dangerous guy you shouldn't have.

Members of the Senate and House, if they want to send troops into war, should be forced to send a family member. That would really make everyone stop and go, 'Ohhh-kaaay.'

Often times I'm confronted with a quote that I don't remember saying. So, on one hand it's very flattering, it is just so surreal.

When you're doing an out-and-out comedy, the notion of preparing for a character - I hope I don't reveal too much of myself here - but, uh, no, I'm not doing anything.

I have only been funny about seventy four per cent of the time. Yes I think that is right. Seventy-four per cent of the time.

In the fourth grade, I learned how to fake walking into a door. You know, you hit it with your hand and snap your head back. The girls loved it.

When you look at someone like Sacha Baron Cohen, you have to really respect the boundaries he is pushing as Bruno or Borat.

I remember going with my mom to a random garage sale as a kid and thinking what a cool treasure hunt that whole world was. Only to transition as an adult to think, 'What a gross place that really is.'

By the time I was ready for college, I didn't know what I wanted to do. I think I secretly wanted a show business career, but I was suppressing it.

All you have in comedy, in general, is just going with your instincts. You can only hope that other people think that what you think is funny is funny. I don't have an answer but I just try to plough straight ahead.

I'm a Cancer; I'm music-passionate. I like long walks on the beach.

I love playing the macho guy who looks like an idiot.

My kind of wanting to be funny didn't come from need, necessarily. The closest I can analyze it is that it was an easy way to make friends, I found out. It was just a great kind of social tool.

I hate when someone drives my car and resets all the radio presets. I don't understand it. If I was ever driving someone's car, I would never touch the things that were set.

I'm a Progressive. Much in the same way our founding fathers - who, oddly enough, wouldn't get elected today - were Progressives.

James Caan told me at the end of filming 'Elf' that he had been waiting through the whole film for me to be funny - and I never was.

I don't really have aspirations to be Tom Hanks.

When I first started doing sketch comedy, I promised myself that if I were ever to have any success in this business, I wouldn't hold back. Why get there and play it safe?

There's nothing sexy about Orange County.

Anyone who does anything creative is always gonna want to change.

I'm a bit of a gourmet chef. I love cooking - mostly Thai food.