"To acquire true self power you have to feel beneath no one, be immune to criticism and be fearless."

"Nothing brings down walls as surely as acceptance."

"You will be transformed by what you read."

"The most important thing is team morale."

"There is a lot of basketball beyond our control, but a player should never let anyone try harder than he does"

"A lion never roars after a kill."

"Michael, if you can't pass, you can't play."

"You should just do the right thing."

"....get a move on, pal, life goes on happening while you're hiding...."

"Jeremy, Good luck on your first marriage."

"It's unrealistic to live your life within such strict parameters."

"I see you that have a little swimming mouse"

"If you stepped out of the shower and saw a leprechaun standing at the base of your toilet, would you scream, or would you innately understand that he meant you no harm?"

"We give anonymously because the sackfuls of thank-you letters break our hearts with their clumsy handwriting and hopeless phonetic spelling."

"The landscape is best described as 'pedestrian hostile.' It's pointless to try to take a walk, so I generally just stay in the room and think about shooting myself in the head."

"My feet are completely flat, but for most of my life they were still shaped like feet. Now, thanks to bunions, they're shaped more like states, wide boring ones that nobody wants to drive through."

"If a person who constantly reads is labeled a bookworm, then I was quickly becoming what might be called a tapeworm."

"Speed eliminates all doubt. Am I smart enough? Will people like me? Do I really look all right in this plastic jumpsuit?"

"At the end of a miserable day, instead of grieving my virtual nothing, I can always look at my loaded wastepaper basket and tell myself that if I failed, at least I took a few trees down with me."

"I'd tried to straighten him out, but there's only so much you can do for a person who thinks Auschwitz is a brand of beer."

"Most people would have found it grotesque, but when you're in love nothing is so abstract or horrible that it can't be thought of as cute."

"This left me alone to solve the coffee problem - a sort of catch-22, as in order to think straight I need caffeine, and in order to make that happen I need to think straight."

"It's just a penis, right? Probably no worse for you than smoking."

"Boys who spent their weekends making banana nut muffins did not, as a rule, excel in the art of hand-to-hand combat."