I started my first business when I was 19. I learned a valuable lesson as a small business owner. You are the first one to work, last one to leave, and last one to be paid.

It's the old Washington fiscal game of Jenga. You try to build as much debt as you can take, as much tax as you can take, until you topple the entire economy.

The first priority of the Republican majority is the security of Americans.

We are committed to doing trade, tax reform, infrastructure. All we need is someone that wants to work with us.

We're going to do tax reform to let people keep more of what they earn, grow an economy, and be able to save for your children's future and buy a new house.

You have to reform the visa program. The chain migration system doesn't work. You need a guest workers program.

Every sandwich I sold, the city got more sales tax, the state got more. But they came in and they would want to give me a ticket because I have a sign outside trying to get more business, right?

If you're in the minority, every advantage is against you, right? So the only advantage you have against the majority is they're too lazy to know their own rules, right? So it's like a game of poker.

I like to be around people, so I ended up being roommates, right? I had a house. I lived with four guys.

I try to drive my office more as a start-up of ideas.

Being whip is working with members, educating them, and trying to move legislation forward.

The thing that we tell - that I tell - members is, 'Vote your district. Vote your conscience; just don't surprise us.'

The whip's office is almost more educational - educating members on the bill itself, listening to members ahead of time.

I believe in being a happy conservative: that you're happy because your policies will give people greater freedom, greater independence. But you have to explain why your policy makes life better.

The most creative people have this childlike facility to play.

Wine is wonderful stuff. But so many people are put off by the snobbery of it.

I'm always meeting new people, and my list of friends seems to change quite a bit.

It seems astounding to me now that the video games are perhaps as important as the movie themselves. And people will spend 2 or 3 years obsessing about the video game in exactly the same way that they'd be obsessing about the movie if they were working on that.

I think that sometimes you do something that makes a small group of people laugh, which is all we were trying to do; we were just trying to make each other laugh.

There's so many good people producing wine now, ... It's just amazing. There's so much on the shelves. You don't have to go buy those overpriced wines.

I think the hard thing for young comedians is that the majority of the young people in the audience out there don't have the wide range of references.

I think there are so many activities going on, like mountaineering. You know, you would pay good money not to have to do that, and yet there are people racing out who want to spend their spare time clambering up rocks.

When you get to my age, and I'm 66 now, you realize that the world is a madhouse and that most people are operating in fantasy anyway. So once you realise that, it doesn't bother you much.

Too many people confuse being serious with being solemn.

Other people, you know, put a latex rubber on, you know, to become sexually excited. There's so much I don't understand.

I learned a lot of things about literature talking to people at the publishing company. Did you know that about 90 percent of celebrity autobiographies are ghostwritten?

I've always found life quite difficult to explain to people or to myself.

I started to make harder jokes before anyone else did. And the producers would get anxious. They'd say, 'That's a little bit hard-edged, isn't it?' And I'd say, 'Let's just try it and see how the audience reacts. If they don't like it, let's cut it out.' And the audience roared with laughter, so I learned you could do this harder humor and people loved it.

When people say 'I'm not a prude, but ...' what they mean is 'I am a prude, and ...'.

Laughter destroys any divisions between people.

We all die at the end, but does that nullify everything? Would most people rather say, "I wish I hadn't been born?" Once you're born you'll have to die, now is that funny or sad?

When people quote sketches to me, half the time I don't know what they're talking about so I have to sort of go, aha, yes, oh yep, I remember that and lie my way out of it.

Either people walk round dressed as chickens or they listen to Beethoven.

It's easier to be creative if you've got other people to play with.

The most creative people have learned to tolerate the slight discomfort of indecision for much longer and so, just because they put in more pondering time, their solutions are more creative.

I don't understand why very, very rich people want to have even more money than they've already got.

It’s only on the brink that people find the will to change. Only at the precipice do we evolve.

Tension is wonderful for making people laugh.

My views are heretical to people who believe in political correctness.

I don't want to hurt people.

Naturally, people's image is of a performer, but the reality of it is the writing for me has always been the most important thing and the most rewarding thing.

I think it's because in America you always get the sense that if you fail, you can just pack up your things and go somewhere else and try again. But in England, it's so geographically small that if somebody succeeds here, it reduces your chances of succeeding.

Now most people do not want an ordinary life in which they do a job well, earn the respect of their collaborators and competitors, bring up a family and have friends. That's not enough any more, and I think that is absolutely tragic - and I'm not exaggerating - that people feel like a decent, ordinary, fun life is no longer enough.

I love having different cultures around, but when the parent culture kind of dissipates, you're left thinking, 'Well, what's going on?'

I think you can write very good comedy without a partner, but what I love about it, working with a partner, is that you get to places you'd never get on your own. It's like when God was designing the world and decided we couldn't have children without a partner; it was a way of mixing up the genes so you'd get a more interesting product.

Don't let anyone tell you what you ought to like... Some wines that some experts think are absolutely exquisite don't appeal to me at all.

I think that money spoils most things, once it becomes the primary motivating force.

I just think that sometimes we hang onto people or relationships long after they've ceased to be of any use to either of you. I'm always meeting new people, and my list of friends seems to change quite a bit.

Some actors, I think, want to feel that they are as creative as the writer. And the answer is, frankly, they're not.

British press think entirely in clichés, and when they do come across creative work, they think that it must be based on something, because they don't realize that you can create things that aren't based on things.