I don't really read a lot. I got a few Booker Prize books and some others and thought I'd try this but quite quickly I just stick them down. I do like some Stephen King books but with some of them I just put them down as well. But I'm like that with telly stuff as well and films or music.

I don't drink anymore, I don't go up the town and I'm not interested in events and parties.

If the Internet went down or there was no telly I would be 'oh no, oh no.'

I actually don't have a lot of faith in comedy.

I felt I was a bit switched off for years, not really caring about things. I don't know if that's depression or whatever, but I was thinking 'I might. Aye I will. No, I willnae' as far as getting a second series goes.

I like wee arguments, I've never been into jokes. I'm more into strange things and madness and things escalating and things not really making sense.

I think no matter where you're from, you're going to be laughing about stuff going on around you.

You hear people talking about a Scottish sense of humour, or a Glaswegian sense of humour, all sorts of countries and cities think that they've got this thing that they're funny. I read about the Liverpudlian sense of humour and I was like, 'Aye? What's that then?' You get that and you especially hear about a dark Glaswegian sense of humour.

I've never cooked a great meal.

I don't mind people liking or not liking me. If you make something and then in the back of your mind you think it could have been a bit better, that can hurt a bit.

It's fine if folk don't like my sense of humour. But if somebody misunderstands, then that hurts a bit.

If I call myself an actor, it sounds like I'm trying to pass myself off as someone who went to drama school.

I think I called myself an entertainer on my son's birth certificate. That sounds a bit Sammy Davis Jr. or Brian Conley, the sort of guy you just drop into a room and let them 'entertain.'

I don't feel comfortable calling myself a writer or a director or an actor.

I don't need a lot: I've got a telly, a computer - what else can you get me?

I'm always checking other people's opinions.

I've never been an embarrassed, 'never talk about their feelings' sort of person.

I've always been a very open person, all my life, even at school.

Going to the doctors - for me that was quite brave, taking that first step. That was a bit scary, saying that I wanted to go on anti-depressants.

I've just got a really sick sense of humour that's separate from reality.

I sometimes wonder if I'm a psychopath.

I really like violence in writing and films.

It's almost like schizophrenia the way I get ideas about things that are not really happening and just end up focusing on them.

I always wanted to get on the telly. Then see when I did, and there was talk about doing more online, Comedy Labs or iPlayer, I was: 'Naw, naw, naw, I want to be On The Telly that sits in the living room and folk watch it together.

I'd never dance at school discos, I couldn't believe people could show themselves like that.

Doctors are just people and they can make mistakes.

I'm just someone who likes making lots of things up and trying to be funny. That's about it.

I think everybody in the world should agree to no care about anything. But we'll all have to do it at the same time.

People say 'Limmy's Show' is kind of hit or miss, but I'd rather that than having something generally likable.

I was asked before to go out on '8 out of 10 Cats,' and I've been asked to go on 'Question Time,' I said to no to that. I don't see myself coming across well on that sort of thing.

In my own mind, I can joke about anything.

I was reading stories by Raymond Carver and some of his stuff sort of ended abruptly here and there, where in other short stories that I've read have a bit of an ending, a climax, a twist or something like that.

My name is Brian and I am a troll. An internet troll.

Why do I want to annoy people? Because annoying people is funny.

Trolling can be a great way to engage with the world, a way to regain self-esteem and happiness, or, dare I say it, a way of life.

I get a lot of ideas sitting in the living room staring at the walls or lying in bed thinking about things.

I'm a pretty solitary type of person.

Some people don't like showing any deviation from normality, but I like talking about things like that, so talking about my mental health wasn't a big deal.

I've said things on Twitter that I've said deliberately because I think they're out of order, I think that's the sense of humour that I've got. I like saying things that I think are terrible, because it gives me a buzz.

I find heartbreaking stuff really funny.

I've got a sick sense of humour, a dark sense of humour. I do care about things and care about people but there's another side to me.

My issue with all sort of social justice stuff and leftie stuff, and I would put myself on a social justice leftie side, is some of the terminology is jargon.

There used to be such a thing as a sick joke, or laughing at misfortune, because comedy and laughter are a way of coping. And there is a kind of cruelty to it, but you can separate finding something horrible funny, and what you really think of it.

For me, in my mind personally and privately, there are no limits to comedy.

I've said before I think the best thing about social media is that it brings people together and the worst thing about social media is that it brings people together. You're assuming that the people following you know what type of person you are and what type of humour you have.

Once conscription was introduced during the First World War, and once Britain's wars ceased being confined to the empire or to continental Europe and began seriously threatening our own shores and safety, it became much easier to denounce any anti-war agitation and argument as inherently irresponsible and unpatriotic.

Like the proverbial elephant in the room, American anti-Europeanism has loomed large for so long that few trouble to notice it.

Both Conservative and Labour politicians in Britain are rather too fond of praising the relative 'classlessness' of American society and of urging their own people to emulate it. There is a certain falseness about such arguments, and also a certain hypocrisy.

American prejudices about Europe rarely surface in headlines, but they are real, pervasive, and ingrained.

Monarchs, aristocrats, and other powerful and wealthy individuals have usually been happy to have themselves and their possessions and families immortalised in oil paintings and sculpture. But before the 20th century, such dynasts rarely commissioned artworks that set out to represent society as a whole.