My son complains about headaches. I tell him all the time, when you get out of bed, it's feet first!

This man is frank and earnest with women. In Fresno, he's Frank and in Chicago he's Ernest.

You have a nice personality, but not for a human being.

If my mother knew I did this for a living, she'd kill me. She thinks I'm selling dope.

My other brother-in-law died. He was a karate expert, then joined the army. The first time he saluted, he killed himself.

This man used to go to school with his dog. Then they were separated. His dog graduated!

I know a man who doesn't pay to have his trash taken out. How does he get rid of his trash? He gift wraps it, and puts in into an unlocked car.

You have a ready wit. Tell me when it's ready.

This is an elegant hotel! Room service has an unlisted number.

I played a great horse yesterday! It took seven horses to beat him.

Those two are a fastidious couple. She's fast and he's hideous.

If you had your life to live over again, do it overseas.

She has a wash and wear bridal gown.

She's a big-hearted girl with hips to match.

You look like a talent scout for a cemetery.

That was the first time I saw a horse start from a kneeling position!

Manchester United are not just some club. To be part of this club also means to be part of a great history.

When I was six years old, my parents told me that we were moving back home to Armenia. I didn't really understand what was happening. My father had stopped playing football, and he was at home all the time.

I know I can succeed at Manchester United, and I want to show everyone that I deserve to be a key player in this team and this league.

Manchester United are not just any football club.

It's always important to read, to know something about this world, so I try to learn, to know, to see what I can learn for myself. Be it from books, TV or the Internet, I try to know what happened in the world.

I can be very serious, but if I'm being honest, I'm very happy with the way my life has turned out.

You have to win every battle. Every small metre counts, and you have to win your duels. Then you will see you will win the game.

There is not much sun, but I didn't move to Manchester to go to the beach.

When I came first to Dortmund, Jurgen Klopp said, 'Listen, Mkhitaryan, it's your family name - it's too long. So Henrikh, it's too long. Let's call you Micki. Are you okay?' I said, 'Okay, no problem.' And since that day, they started calling me Micki.

If you make a mistake, your opponent can punish, and you end up losing the game.

It is not only about being technically good, it is all about giving your heart for the club, giving your best.

I never promise something; I always say that I will try. Because if you promise something and you don't do it, you will always be under pressure.

You have to try and do everything to show your best qualities; otherwise, you will not be here anymore.

I want to do everything to get to a new level.

English football is really different to football in other countries.

As tough as it was for us with my father gone, my mother and sister were always pushing me. They even let me go to Brazil by myself when I was 13 to train with Sao Paulo for four months.

I dreamed of being like Kaka, and Brazil was the home of that creative style, which the Brazilians call ginga.

The Brazilians are amazing in their nature. You cannot describe it; you must feel that warmth when you're around them to understand.

When I returned to Armenia after four months in Brazil, I was still quite skinny and weak, but I had technique and skill.

I think the first goal can be weight off your shoulders.

I went a long way to play in Manchester United, so nothing will prevent me from achieving my dream.

I will not retreat; I will find the strength to reach my goal.

My time with my father would be very meaningful, but also very short.

I didn't know it, but my father had a brain tumour. Everything happened very fast. Within a year, he was gone. Because I was so young, I didn't completely understand the concept of death.

The year after my father died, I started football training. He was the drive for me; he was my idol. I said to myself, 'I have to run just like him. I have to shoot just like him.'

It doesn't matter if they buy me for, I don't know, £38 million or £40m - I am not guaranteed to play the games.

I went a long way to play for Manchester United, so nothing will prevent me from achieving my dream.

As a footballer, you just have to try to learn what you've done bad and what I could do good.

Different managers give confidence in different ways. Some by hugging, others by talking or having conversations.

Brazil was a very good experience. I learned a lot about how to play football, both technical and physical. There would be a hundred kids of all ages, training and doing classes together.

There are no disappointments, just challenges.

I never give up when I encounter obstacles in my way. I just continue going until I reach my career objectives.

Regarding Jose Mourinho, I hope I can learn a lot from him - he is a coach with a fantastic record.

It is very difficult when you grow up without a father because you don't have a man who can give you direction and discipline.